Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
