so that wasnt chicken after all
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
He better not be in your backpack
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
