rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
