Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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