More tranny stories later!
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Damn victory sex feels great
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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