Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
