i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
