now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
