Small penises have feelings too.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
