I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
