ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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