he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
