every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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