spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
