is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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