This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
