I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
