Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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