Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
