Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
