Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
