party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
