I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
