Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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