new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
