you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
