a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
