you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
