ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
you will always have a special place in my vag
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
