Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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