his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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