So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Im part way to drunk.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
