he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
