If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
