We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
he shaved USA in his pubs
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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