I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
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