sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
