Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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