We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I FOUND THE LEGS
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
