Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
