She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
