New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
