nut hugger
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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