sarcasm needs its own font
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Randomize
