JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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