At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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