I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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