If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
