I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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