I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize